Blog Stalk and Fawk You Friday!

Y'all already know my favorite cousin (you know, the slutty Nascar loving one) CB, right?  Of course you do, everyone knows that crazy whore.  What you may not know about her is that she is fickle!  Oh so fickle!

Ashley has decided to make a bit of a change to Blog Stalk Friday this week, because there are all kinds of people linking up that don't read or understand the rules of Blog Stalk Friday.  Since CB is a little fire cracker this makes her angry.  Trust me, you won't like he when she's angry.  Well, I like her when she's angry, cause it's kind of hot but that's just me.

So she's wanting us to try to get some new people to link up with Blog Stalk Friday this week.  So if you've never linked up head on over to One Crazy Brunette Chick and do it!  Oh, and tell her that her favorite Ashlee with two E's sent you, you might get some brownie points or maybe even some purple monkey balls or something cool like that!

Now, on to Fawk You Friday which is hosted by every ones favorite pair of Boobies...oh, and their owner Jana and her fabulous co-hostess Christy from I'm Just Sayin'!

1. Fawk you to anyone who thinks that I can't be a good parent because I say cunt, whore, bitch, shit, damn and/or the many variations of fuck.  Last I checked my use of language didn't have fuck all to do with my being a Mommy, and trust me I'm a damn good Mommy to my boys -- I dare anyone to stand in front of me and say that I'm not to my face!
2. Fawk you to liars who try to scam people or Churches out of money.  You might be able to pay your bills and all that if you didn't spend so much money on prescription drugs from your favorite local street pharmacist and liquor.  You might even be able to buy your kids the things that they need too!  Just sayin'!
3. Fawk you to anyone who abuses their children or any child or children for that matter.  
4. A special Fuck You going out to Elisa Baker who wrote a fake ransom note when her step-daughter was reported missing.  DSS had been to their house many times and their own family reported them in hopes of getting little Zahra out of that house of hell.  Elisa had forced Zahra to stay in her room, and Zahra was often seen with a black eye and bruises and cuts on her body.  She had lost a leg from childhood bone cancer and had lung cancer as well.  That stupid bitch was abusing that beautiful little girl while she had cancer.  Zahra had a beautiful smile, and was fighting for her life against cancer only to be abused by an uncaring step-mother and lose her life to the hands of the very people who were supposed to protect her.  (the parents haven't been charged, but the dogs hit on both family cars as well as an industrial wood chipper and a pile of mulch.)  I am sickened by this story and by this woman and her husband.  I hope that they can find Zahra so that she can have a proper burial and rest in peace!  She was a beautiful child who deserved to be treated so much better!
5. Fawk You to Conan O'Brien for ignoring my tweets and my polite request that he follow me back.  Fawk Conan for being a twitter snob!
6. Fawk You to anyone who isn't willing to get on board with my Stick Money Revolution!
7. Fawk You Sons of Anarchy, for being so addictive that I stayed up half the night watching!

Conan O'Brien, Twitter Snob Extraordinaire

If you're a follower of mine on Twitter then you have probably noticed that I'm highly offended that Conan O'Brien is not following me back and that I'm willing to do just about anything to get him to follow me.  I'm not hurt so much as I am shocked.  I mean, I put a lot of time into following Conan, no not in a creepy stalker way.  I don't live near him, and it just doesn't make sense for me to commute for this purpose right now.  We're hoping that maybe in a year or two this might be possible, but right now it's just not.  What with gas prices, my youngest not being in school, my therapist telling me 3 times a week that it's just not healthy.  You know, all the practical reasons. 

Anyway, I got up this morning and went to check for new tweets over at Conan O'Briens twitter page.  I guess I just don't pay attention to numbers all that much, but today it hit me.  Conan O'Brien is not following me back.  Seriously Conan?  Seriously?  I honestly couldn't believe it!  I mean, you spend all this time following this person, laughing at their tweets, giggling at their wit and then you find out that they do not follow you back.  It's an earth shattering, life altering experience, to say the least.  To top it all off I also see that Conan is only following one person.  Just one person.  I got to thinking, what does this person have that I don't have?  Why is Conan only following this one person, and oddly enough that person is not me.

Did he not see the #FF Tweet that Ian @TheDDoR sent out about me?  Does he not know about how impossibly amazing and awesome I am?  Is he not aware about how much I love him and how I was a loyal supporter of his shows?  Does he not know that I am not boycotting the entire NBC network?  Don't worry Coco, I still fully believe that without you they are nothing, even though I am quite distraught that you in fact do not follow me back. 

I've even offered to send him some Columbus Day decorations if he will just follow me back.  You see Conan was looking for some Columbus Day decorations yesterday, but couldn't find any.  So I, being a Columbus Day loving American, just like Conan, offered to send him some of my amazing hand made Columbus Day decorations.  He should really just give up, quit being the ultimate Twitter snob and follow me back.  I'm a good friend in real life, but I'm an even better friend on Twitter.  Ask anyone, it's true!  I mean how many of your twitter followers have offered to send you hand made decorations for obscure holidays that no one decorates for?  I'm willing to bet none, but I did Conan!

I have also offered to battle the one person he follows in a Conan Follows the Winner on Twitter Fight to the Death.  But I'm afraid that may not have been very attention grabbing.  Conan probably hears that all the time, so I guess I'm just going to have to brain storm something more memorable and a bit more unique to grab his attention.

What would you do if you were trying to get Conan O'Brien to follow you on Twitter?  Any suggestions?