PYHO- To my Baby Loves

Dear Aiden,

Aiden!  My darling boy, sweet as pie and all personality.  These days you are insisting on doing everything on your own.  Big things, small things -- everything all on your very own!  It's a kind of bitter sweetness that I never knew existed.  I love it because it's validating as a Mommy to see your baby boy grow into a loving, self-assured, imaginative, beautiful, independent and very kind little boy.  It's bitter though because I loved being the one to do all of those things for you.  I know that it's a Mothers job to teach you to do all of those things yourself, to teach you to be kind and sympathetic to others but to not let people walk all over you and to teach you how to grow into your own person so that one day you can be a wonderful grown man with good values and a good upbringing and childhood.  It does go by so fast though.

Today, as I sit thinking about your 4th birthday I really feel extra blessed to be your Mommy.  Because you are amazingly kind for a 4 year old little boy.  You have an imagination like no other I've ever seen, and I can have better conversations with you than I can have with most adults, you're so smart.  And you're sweet!  Lord, are you ever sweet -- you're just as sweet as pie, and you love everyone around you with your full heart.  You're the first one to offer something of yours to a sick cousin or friend, giving them candy, toys, juice, food or whatever it is that you have that you think will make them feel better.  You say 'I Love You' to all of your family and friends before you leave them, and you give out hugs like nobodies business!  I'm proud of the little boy that you are, and I'm proud of your Daddy and myself for having raised you to be the child that you are.

It won't be long until you are four years old.  Has it really been almost four years since the first time I saw that angelic little face of yours?  I love watching you grow, but I miss your younger days.  I suspect that it's always going to be that way, even when you're 40.  You've taught me so much about myself, about love and about the world.  Most importantly you taught me that with little boys you want to lay something over them while you're reaching for the diaper to put on them because that split second is the second they will choose to pee, directly on you, almost every time.  Before I had you I was a whole other person!  I am a better version of myself because of you, you. Jagger and Daddy truly do bring out the best in me.  It is because of you that I know how to be a better wife, a better friend and a better person in general.  You taught me what love truly is, real unconditional love the kind that can't be broken.

Don't grow up too fast, love!  Always know that Mommy is here for you, no matter what you've done or what you've been through.  You're such a special little guy, and you're pretty handsome as well, if I do say so myself!  You've got a HUGE personality and you're not like anyone I've ever know, child or adult.  I love how innocent you are, and how your personality can capture an entire room full of people.  I love how sweet you are and how bad you feel when someone else is sick or crying.  I love how much you love your brother, how protective of him you are and how you like to play with him and share with him.  

To sum it up and quote one of our favorite books to read together:

"I love you through and through!  Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow too!"

My Faith

I've been taking the time to reflect a bit on my faith lately.  This probably has something to do with the fact that my family and I have made our way back to the Church recently.  Typically we go to Church with Justin's Mother, who is a long time member of a Free Will Baptist Church, but we're attending a Methodist Church now.  Honestly, so far, I've not been able to see a difference between Baptist, Freewill Baptist and Methodist Churches.  I don't remember the last time that I attended a Baptist Church though.

After Prayer Meeting/ Bible Study (I'm not sure what to call it, as I've heard it called both) last night I began to wonder what the differences were between the different denominations within the Christian Churches.  I've researched a lot of religions, and I have an obsessive need to buy Catholic iconography anytime I see it in any store, but embarrassingly I don't know as much as I thought i did about the Christian faith, my own faith.  So I'm making it my mission to find out what the differences between Churches actually is.

The pastor, who is very new to this Church as he has only been there for 2 Sundays so far, had asked a question about something.  I forget exactly what he was asking about but it was either about what they usually did on Wednesday nights for Bible Study or what the adult Sunday School Teacher taught from.  I believe it was about the latter.  He said that he taught from books or magazines or something of that nature that he buys over at Johnny's Shoe Shop.  (My Aunt Shirley and Uncle John own the local Christian book store here in town, and my Aunt runs the book store part and in back my Uncle John ran his old fashioned shoe shop, for many many years, he was indeed a master of fixing soles while she was helping people enrich and nourish their souls, so it's a nice fit if you ask me!)  Apparently, whatever he taught from was Baptist, but as I said the Church it is taught at is Methodist.  The Pastor had said that he grew up Baptist, and was a member of the Baptist Church but come to find out his beliefs were more in line with the Methodist way of thinking.

I knew there were differences between the Churches, but I didn't think they were really all that different.  I mean, they are all Christian Churches so I just assumed they all believed the same things and the same way.  I was, apparently, wrong.  So I'm going to start asking the people who I admire most for their devotion to their Faith what the differences are, and other questions I have about that.

I love our Church that we have started attending, and I am so glad that we found it!  No I truly understand what people mean when they talk about their Church Family.  They have just welcomed us with open arms at the Church, and they are all so sweet to us.  They all thank us for coming each time we attend and tell us that they hope to see us back there again.  It's such a nice feeling.  It's the feeling of belonging somewhere.  I feel so content when I am there, I'm happy and smiling and I get so excited to go the whole day of I'm just so excited for Church!  I wish that there were more than 3 days to attend.  I was thinking last night and out of nowhere I thought that 3 days was too long to go in between services.  We attend Sunday, Wednesday and on Monday there is a youth meeting in the evening where they have two classes for older and younger children and they eat, learn and make crafts and such.

It's been so good for Aiden too.  Since his brother is right at 3 years younger than he is and he doesn't have very many playmates his age he doesn't get to play with other children all that much.  He has his cousins from my brothers family that live across the road, but they are much older than he is, Kain (the oldest of his cousins at 11 years old) does enjoy Aiden, and plays with him so well and I don't have to worry about Aiden when he's with Kain because Kain is so protective over his baby cousin.  Justin's sisters and their children, who were both born within the year after Aiden (Can you tell who the trend setter of this family is?  Moi, of course! =)live around 30 minutes or so away and we don't see them very often at all.  Aiden has been able to socialize more at Church, and it is so good for him.  He loves other children, and is very social.  He adores going and seeing the other kids and being able to be around them and play with them at Church, especially on Monday and Wednesday evenings, because it's a better time for socializing than in the middle of the Church service is.   I am so happy to be able to take them to Church and bring them up there as well.  I think it's important for children to go to Church with their families and learn about God and Jesus and having faith.  I think it teaches them morals as well, even though that is something that parents need to teach their children as well.

I'm sorry that this post is A.) So long.  I'm very verbose, but I am trying to work on that!  and B.) Was posted after I already posted today, but it was a short post (see, I am really trying despite my relapse here) so I don't know if that counts.  Either way, I'm sorry I am so long winded and have so much to say about so much.  (=

I'm going to try to get some Christian based movies or books for the boys.  Do any of you have any recommendations?  I was thinking of looking up the Veggie Tails movies and things, do any of you use them? I'm also going to order the Quest Study Bible (New International Version)!  Do you have any recommendations of books for my husband and myself to read?